Financial Disaster Root Cause of Common Marriage Problems
Independent studies by consumer credit and marriage counseling services show that financial issues are one of the most common marriage problems and are near the top of the list for causing marriage break ups.
Financial problems in marriage, if not handled correctly, can increase stress levels, fuel arguments, cause partners to start blaming each other and often lead to separation and divorce.
Long term financial problems can just eat away at your lives, make you dread every day as it comes and force you into making life changing, sometimes totally irrational decisions in a deperate attempt to get your finances back on track.
The first thing you need to come to terms with is that the situation is not going to resolve itself. It’s no good trying to push it to the back of your mind and carry on as normal. You need to accept that there is a problem that needs to be sorted and set aside time to consider, discuss and put an action plan in place.
Don’t start blaming each other you aren't alone and like most common marriage problems financial issues can be resolved. At the end of the day it doesn’t matter how you got into the mess it just matters how you are going to get out. There is no point in dwelling on the past, it’s gone and there is nothing you can do to change it but whatever action you take now will have a direct impact on your future and the future of your marriage.
The biggest step in resolving common marriage problems is accepting they exist and being prepared to do something about it.
Then, if you are serious about wanting to turn your life around and save your marriage you need to understand the true extent of the problem.
Sit down, with your partner and list your income and all your expenditure. No arguments, no blame, no character attacks just calmly discuss all your outgoings and list them down.
· Be totally honest about what you are spending whether you partner knows about it or not.
· This is the time to be totally open and honest. You will not get through this unless you lay all your cards on the table.
· If you are going to sort this mess out you cannot have any secrets. Too many people keep financial secrets from their partners and so often such actions lead to divorce. Don’t be one of them, it’s not kind and it’s not clever, it’s just down right stupid.
· Disclose how much you owe on credit cards, store cards, loans and any other outstanding liabilities, both jointly and independently.
Once you have your comprehensive list and you exactly what you spend each month and how much you owe in interest on cards and loans you need to start going through each item one by one and working out how to reduce your outgoings and, if possible, increase your income.
Resolving common marriage problems is a two-way street, to resolve your financial issues you both have to make short term sacrifices for long term gain!!
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