It’s a common complaint, an annoying situation, even a man’s worst nightmare.
You know what I’m talking about: When a girl you like wants to be "just friends."
Aaaaargh! Who wants that? You like this girl, you want intimacy, but all she wants is friendship. How do you turn things around?
In short, you have to make a girl REMEMBER you. Whereas guys who are much more than friends are always on a woman’s mind, friends are just…there. There’s no special emotion connected to them. They’re just…friends.
So how do you change this?
Let’s start with the basics: What do women want in a romance? Well, if you’ve read my previous blog post (and if you haven’t, do it now!), you know that women are looking for STAND-UP GUYS, guys who mean business and don’t take no for an answer. They want a protector, a defender, a man who will always be at their side.
Now ask yourself: Is that me?
If you’re the kind of guy who avoids conflict, treats women with deference and worship, jumps at the opportunity to listen to her moan…
Then you’re a nice guy. You don’t stand up for yourself. You don’t assume leadership. You sit down when a woman wants you to jump up and save her butt!
So it seems, nice guys always finish last. They end up in the friend zone, instead of the BED zone.
But does it have to be that way?
NO! You just have to make one change that will forever transform your game. I’m not talking about becoming a bad boy; you can be a stand-up guy without being a jerk. Stand-up guys are just good guys who give women the same things they love about bad boys–without beating girls up and treating them like trash.
I’m talking about bringing to the table the one thing girls love. The one thing bad boys–and stand-up guys–have that nice guys just don’t. The difference between nice guys and STAND-UP guys can pretty much be summarized in one word: attitude.
The stand-up guys, the guys who are MORE than just friends, bring ALPHA ATTITUDE to the table. They bring confidence, swagger, independence, and centered-ness around them. Whereas nice guys revolve their worlds around pleasing and being nice to women, stand-up guys revolve their world around themselves. They’re on a path, a mission, and people want to join them. They draw people in--rather than ward them off.
And if a woman doesn’t want to join them, it’s her loss. But if she does want to join him, she better recognize that his world, is her world. Not the other way around.
If a girl is "just friends" with you, she probably doesn’t take you seriously enough. Or, you haven’t shown her you’re serious enough about HER for her to make a move herself.
So how do you change things so that your female friend/acquaintance/secret crush will be attracted to you?
Listen to Carlos Xuma:
"Women want STRONG Alpha Men. Guys who can lead them and protect them. Don’t make the mistake of believing that women want jerks. They only desire certain Alpha qualities the jerk possesses and that the Nice Guy is afraid to show. These Alpha qualities act like a potent drug on her nervous system, blinding her (temporarily) to the reality of the Jerk’s bad influence. Eventually she finds herself emotionally locked to someone she doesn’t like, but can’t seem to get away from."
In other words, you show a girl attitude. You penetrate her emotions. You become a drug to her, someone so daring, so masculine, so irresistible, that thoughts of you are stuck in her head day and night. They want to see you so badly, that nothing else crosses their minds.
Contrast these emotions to the ones she feels about nice guys, the "just friends." Does she even remember who they are?
When it comes to getting the girls you want, it often all comes down to the first meeting and first impression. It’s true: two of the most common mistakes men make are either showing too much sexual intention too soon, or not showing any at all. Mistake number two will leave you in the Friend Zone. So how do you strike that balance?